Monday, March 31, 2008

DS Video Games: Sarge finds out whats the HYPE








I recantly got myself a Nintando Gameboy DS which is really a big chucnk of plastic that i could break in half if i wanted to. I decided to do some game reviews so that your CASH doesn't go to hell like it always does.

First off I will review the new game: ADVANCE WAR 3: DAYS OF RUINS. This game can be got for your Nintendo Gameboy DS, which has a double screen (hence the name "DS Game") so you can watch the Football game while your wife players "ADVANCE WAR3".

First impression of ADVANCE WAR3 was that it had a better graphics than the others put TOGETHER! If you go for tanks don't let them die! Also, it had an internet ability that lets you trade "spacegum dollars" for WAGONS of stuff! This is great!

Rating:

Graphics - 10 - So much graphics, will leave you begging for more!
Control - 7 - Good but what is this thing meant to be controlled by Earthworms?????
Sounds - 7 - Songs had no words to them
Playing it - 8 - I played it

OVERALL RANK: 10!



Next game is the longly anticipated Super Mario Brothers 2! Also for the Nintendo Gameboy DS.
Many of you have been waiting for a true sequal to the Mario game which was originally on Nitnendo 64. Luck would have it, like mario himself says, "here you goooo!!!" This game has double the screens of the last game (it has two screens now) and you can now finally use those blue shells that were in teh last game for something. It's an item and it makes you go hogwild on those cretacious cretins! I played this game for hours because it was fun to play it.

Graphics - 4 - This graphics werent as good as the last game but considering they had two screens i guess it's very good.
Battery life - 9 - The battery on my Nintedo Gameboy DS has never died yet! I can bench press 200 pounds
Music - 5.5 - The voice acting was bad.
Playing it - 5 - nice GAME, whoever deisgned this probably wears his pants on his head for a living, seriously!

FINAL GRADE: 2 - I have to say after 100 years practically (ok that was exagaration, YOU try writing a Log, you take artistic merats from time to time, shows how much you know).


Last but NOT least, we have a new game from developer Sega Genesis, It is apparently a mix of Smash Brothers and Sonic the Hedgehog. I could not find any picture of this game Super Smash Brothers MELEE, so I used a picture of a headless monster online:
Anyway you get the drift, it's basically a fighting game with one simple premise: NO ONE GOES HOME ALIVE. this leaves for a power-act like a hammerpunch or a codthrow to have the most victories. When I play games like SMASH BROTHERS, i break the other person's morale quickest. They submit and ask to play a different game.

Graphics - 7 - What the HELL, where is that monster's head? You can't just say he is a "headless" and pretend he doesnt need to wear a head like the roost of us!!!!
Control - 7 - I used an old fashion controller and i had some problems, it wouldn't fit into the controller port for one! outlandish!
Sounds - 7 - you can compose your own songs for the game on Mario Paint. however the game costs 30 dollars.
Playing it - 8 - For all I know, that bus-load of kids who was sent REELING into a bus full of LAVA is all DEAD by now cuz I was just ZONED-IN to this game so long!

OVERALL RATING for "ICEWIND DALE 2" 10!



Thank you for Reviewing my games, next time we will have a more interesting article here about my stay in the Presidantial Dungeon.

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